Friday, February 10, 2012

all of him

My baby is going to his first away hockey tournament.  He is leaving with his Dad for three days.  He packed the suitcase himself and got all the essentials.  Socks, sweats, t-shirts and knee hockey sticks.  Plus, snacks and drinks for the long drive. And the part that swells me with emotion?  One stuffed animal.  Thud goes my heart.

Because he's big and little all at once.  He's goalie tough and soft heart both.  He gave me a reassuring grin when I said I wasn't coming this time.  "That's okay mom, I'll just call you after every game so you know how we did. Oh and can I take the movie Lilo and Stitch with me?"  

I think we've watched that movie a hundred times together.  And the memory of the two of us watching, snuggled together on the couch with his sippee cup and stuffed animals, cocoons around us as I hug him goodbye.  I am sending bits of me with him.  And he has yet to fully know, my whole heart is crammed with all of him.  Gosh I love that kid. 

Good luck Squirt White team! 


  1. Good luck to the whole team! You know he is carrying you with him too. That is why he is taking along those things that remind him of you. So sweet. :0)

    This quote kind of goes along with this, even though it is Colton who is going away for the weekend.

    "She never quite leaves her children at home, even when she doesn't take them along." ~Margaret Culkin Banning


  2. them to pieces.
    I love the fact that he's taking his stuffed animal. I want to share this 'stuffed animal' story with you, please. Our daughter married several years ago (sobs from Mama and Daddy as we missed her so much...) but she didn't leave 'alone.' She took her stuffed bear with her. Her husband called me a year or so later and said, "How long has she been sleeping with this bear?" I smiled BIG TIME! I said, "Since her Great Grandmother gave it to her when she was a little itty bitty girl." He said, "OK." And with a shrug, he realized that the bear was part of her. I went over to their house the other day to keep their precious almost-two-year old girl. I peeked into my daughter and son-in-law's bedroom...and there propped on her pillow in their giant sleigh bed was...the bear. She's 30 years old, and she still has it with her every night. There is no face to it. It's long worn off...but the heart of the bear will always be there.
    How very sweet that your youngest is taking parts of home with him...including the movie he watched with Mom again and again. I'm proud of him for packing his own bag! I wish him and the team the best of luck.
    Hugs and much love to you, sweet friend.

  3. What a special young man in the making. Best wishes to him and the team.

  4. I saw the frost, I thought of you. I knew you would take AMAZING pictures. I love when Anthony packs for himself too and always includes a stuffed animal. If you need a friend while they are gone do not hesitate, I can come anytime with something warm to drink!

  5. Sounds like Camden - old enough to go to a tournament, but still bringing along something to sleep with and a cartoon movie. Sweet!

  6. I think this sounds like the beginning of a young boy that is growing up and spreading his wings. You've done a great job as a mother....never forget that. He'll be just fine mom, sniffle, sniffle!

  7. So sweet. Gotta love that boy.

  8. I love the leopard in the suitcase! ..and all this *love* all around.

    I wish your family a great weekend home and away -

  9. I don't know that they ever truly understand how our hearts are "crammed full of them." My boys, though - it's not the stuffed animals they take with them - it's the blanket, most notably the blue cotton blanket:) Wishing his team great success - and wishing that you receive great detail (my boys are not good at the details). I loved coming by, visiting with a mom-of-sons!

  10. I too had a bear I kept 18 years I sewed it and resewed it. Once you get used to sleeping on it, it fits your head and there is no other shoulder or pillow comfortable enough lol
    Finally it disappeared.
    He was my best friend. So sad. lol

  11. "My heart is crammed with all of him." love that line...

    Beautiful post my friend...

  12. So very welly right now. He knows how you love him, dear heart, and he takes pieces of you wherever he goes. You are one amazing Mama.

  13. Our hearts just fill to bursting with love for our boys, don't they? And to think, I wanted all girls! God sure knew what He was doing - for you, for me. :) Bet it was hard to send him out the door but, having read what came after, I know it was worth the victory!


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