Saturday, September 15, 2018

The Hospice Journey

Hello everyone,

After starting the care of Hospice I quickly settled into their routine and structure.  My nurse whose name is Angel is just that-warm, sweet, and kind, but smart too.  We've gotten along well.  I was able to start on a lot of the same meds I had been taking but they bumped up my pain meds right away.

What I've noticed over the past few weeks is that as soon as a complaint is rendered by me, its quickly addressed by them.  Meds are taken away, added or exchanged.  My pain has steadily been increasing and we have been adjusting accordingly. It's been tough because of how much it changes from day to day. I may be feeling fine one day and see people and then next day I'm filled with pain and unable to do much at all. I am supported in all my daily needs by those around me. I feel myself getting weaker as the days go on.

It is tough to answer questions on how I am doing as it changes moment to moment. At one point we thought it would be hours or days until I passed. This week I had a boost after my brother Lee came to visit. Currently I feel the pain is increasing and I am more uncomfortable. We are still sharing our moments together with family and friends. The time will be whatever God's plan is for me.

I feel that I have been very blessed and I am so grateful to everyone for all the prayers, support and love along this journey.

All shall be well...

34 comments:

  1. Sept. 15
    Sweet friend...
    You have given and given your love all these
    years. You have given it with grace and with ease. May the pain you are feeling leave you. May your breaths be peaceful and your heart filled with the love of those who surround you and those of us who have never met you.
    Rest, my Sister in Christ. Rest.
    I love you.
    Jackie

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  2. You are a shining example of grace, inner strength, and love.

    Praying for many meaningful moments and loving conversations.

    Love, prayers, misty eyes from over here. Believing all shall be well.

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  3. Dear Vicky, what a blessing it is to see these words from your heart and to have you mingle here with us while you are able. You are always giving, but it know that it is okay to just rest in God's love. Today, I wish you sweetness from all corners. I am so very grateful for your brother's visit, and to know you are being tended to when needed. We love you so much! XOXO, now and forever!

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  4. Thank you for caring enough about all of us to check in. We are continuing to think about you so often and to pray.

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  5. My cousin died from a massive heart attack when she was just 30, with two very young children. It’s difficult to understand when good people die so young......I know you are older than that, but the world will be a little less bright without you.........I can only believe that there will be rest, and comfort, love, and no more pain.
    I will never forget your strength, your grace, your perseverance. You are one special lady.

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  6. Bless you...and I am praying for you and thinking of you so much.
    I have been following your journey
    Annie

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  7. I don't have words...mine seem so shallow and meaningless. Yours are always filled with such peace,love and wisdom. Just know that even though I don't comment often, I do read and learn from every post you share. Sending love and prayers...and Vicky, when the time does come, please give Gitz a big hug from me. XOXOX

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  8. Always together....forever and ever....

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  9. Dear, sweet Vicky, you are brave and so strong! What an inspiration you are to me (and so many others). I pray for you EVERY night by name. The angels are with you especially that one special one by your side.

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  10. Mrs. Grace under fire...do you tealire the gift you once again just gave? I don't think I have ever seen a post or update...like this off someone facing the end of there journey here...you wrote about thinking it was hours or days and you thought you would pass... Do you realize what real you just spoke and shared? Do you realize how many are listening to your words..your voice
    In this stage of your journey. Do you truly realize the grace you share...do you realize none of us want you to leave...and yet...I don't want you in the pain you speak off...My prayers and thoughts are with you constantly. I am so thrilled your brother was able to visit...Vicky you are a rare amazing gift of real the world has always needed. How I miss hearing from you..and how much this meant..to hear from you..a selfless act done for us! That Vicky is what is so amazing...you are wrapped up in love...you are so precious in his site! Love you sooooo..always will. You are the blue print...the example...you are true beauty! Wrapping his love around you...

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  11. Wishing you and your family pain relief and continued strength

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  12. God bless. Praying for good days with a lessening of the pain.

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  13. Vicky, I pray for you and your family that you will have peace in the days to come. I have followed your journey for quite some time and I admire your strength and resolve to live your life out with dignity. Thank you for sharing the good the bad and the ugly throughout your battle with breast cancer. You have been an inspiration to many. May the Lord keep you and bless you and hold you in his hands.

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  14. Sending you my prayers and love. <3 <3 <3

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  15. Gods strength is made perfect in your weakness. Praying peace and mercy for you and yours.
    Your sister in Christian
    Nancy

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  16. Sending so much love and light your way, Vicky. You are a warrior, that has gifted so many with your talents, courage and love. I pray for your body to be comfortable. I pray for your time to be filled with your family. I pray for you to be filled with peace.

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  17. Continuing to pray for you and your family. I'll specifically pray that your pain can be controlled and lessened as much as possible. And also, that you and your family will feel the peace, comfort and presence of the Lord. My words seem to fail me as I'm finding it difficult to express what's in my heart. {I hate goodbyes} I'm so thankful that I found your blog many years ago. You are a warrior indeed and a light for Jesus. Thank you, sweet Vicky, for sharing your story and journey with us.

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  18. But, as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him”— 1 Cor 2:9 Oh the Glory that is ahead for you. You have served Him well. Praying for comfort from pain and eyes to see the hope of Heaven before you precious Vicky.

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  19. "Homesick for heaven" I'm praying continually for you, Vicky. God is so near. Soon you will be in His presence face to face hearing Him say, "Well done thou good and faithful servant." Throughout this crucible called cancer you have honored him always remaining steadfast. Rest well, my sweet friend.
    Until we meet in the New Jerusalem.
    Carolynn Mintz
    Central Oregon

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  20. Dear Vicky. Life is exactly that, sharing of love moment to moment. I am so grateful to have found your blog many years ago. You have been such a bright light of life for the crowd of witnesses that have gathered here. Although I have never met you, I feel that you're my friend. Goodbyes convey finality, but we will all come together soon, in the most glorious place, heaven. Soon you will be in the presence of Savior. Job very well done. I continue to pray for you and your family.

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  21. Sending love and comfort. Prayers too.

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  22. Oh my precious soul sister,
    I am so grateful for you...for your love, compassion, grace, resilience, wisdom and the gratitude you express for even the smallest blessing. In my 71 years on this planet, you, my dear soul sister, have truly been one of my greatest teachers. Just today, with Bert's health issues, I hear myself say "I choose gratitude. No matter what, I choose to be grateful for this day and all it brings." I learned that from YOU! You remind me to turn to Jesus. You remind me to treasure every minute, for each one is a gift. You remind me to take a breath and let my eyes rest on the gorgeous fall leaves. My prayer for you today, dear heart, is that He would give you a peace that fills you up with hope and knowing. He is there, sweet Vicky, and you are never, ever alone. I will love you and miss you forever, but know you are going home to Him. Always to the moon and back, dear heart, the moon and back again!
    Your grateful sister of the heart!
    Linda

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  23. Sending you and your family many prayers and much love and strength. Thank you for sharing your own beautiful heart with all of us. May God bless you and keep you happy and pain free in these moments.

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  24. Vicky,

    I have followed you for some time now, but never commented. I just wanted to thank you for changing my life in ways I am unable to put into words. You have made me a better mom, sister and daughter through your amazing gift of words. Most importantly, you have strengthened my belief in Christ. I imagine you have touched many more lives of people like me. May your journey be peaceful and your family find the strength to say goodbye for now. You give new meaning to the word strength, my friend. Peace and love to you!

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  25. Vicky,
    I just want to say thank you. I have been following your blog for quite a while, and it is very apparent that you have touched many, and given hope and love to so many, as you’ve journeyed on through this part of your life. Thank you for many great childhood memories, & thank you for sharing this part of your life too, and thank you for sharing God’s love for all of us here! Take care my friend, and to you and your family, prayers for peace, & comfort, & hope & faith & love.
    Dana

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  26. Prayers for you, your hubby and the boys! Hugs for all of you from New Jersey!

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  27. Oh my dear friend,
    Holding you close in my prayers right this very minute. May you know in your deepest heart-of-hearts that you are not alone. He is right there with you. Keeping Rick and the boys in my prayers too! Love you to the moon and back again, my precious soul sis!
    Linda

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  28. God bless you, Vicky. I will continue to keep you in my prayers.

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  29. Thinking about you with love.
    Lynda in Michigan

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  30. Lifting you in prayer, precious Vicky.
    Lovingly,
    Carolynn Mintz

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  31. Oct. 6, 2018
    I have you on my mind and heart and wanted to let you know.
    I love you,
    Jackie

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  32. My dear sweet friend,
    Sending you loves, hugs and prayers, precious Vicky. No matter what,
    you are not alone. He is there with you, holding you close. We are all
    holding you in our prayers! Love you always to the moon and back again!
    Your soul sis, Linda

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  33. How I became a happy woman again
    With tears of joy and happiness I am giving out my testimony to all viewers on line, my problem with Stomach Cancer stage IB and HIV has caused me many pains and sadness especially in my family.
    I was so afraid of loosing my life, I suffered the embarrassment of visiting
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    ReplyDelete

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