Friday, June 3, 2011

Stuck in the blender...

I think my life is in blend mode these days, its seems that green smoothies aren't the only things that come out of my blender.  I have days where my emotions get tangled inside.  When I get too far ahead of myself, they threaten to whirl off into space, and I've learned to jam the on the off switch and change my direction as quickly as possible.

Some days its my brain that feels like its stuck in the blender, chemo brain is no joke.  Mostly I look at common objects and struggle with what to call them, and sometimes names won't come to mind.  But mostly its my daily life that is becoming a blend- normal every day life, like planting spring flowers, taking the boys to their activities, and doing laundry, with a heaping side of all things "cancer."  It goes a little like this...

Notice that so far "planting" of flowers has not happened, only "buying" and "hanging" flowers.  But normal spring activity nonetheless.

Then theres a knock at the door and this arrives.  I've been warned its a brutal regimen, and I have no plans for attempting something like this, but I've also heard this is a great read... so here I go...

And along with a little Lance, some more Kris Car.  She is like the EF Hutton of cancer, if she is talking, I am listening! 

Had to throw in this extraordinary example of normal... Rick's company does the yearbook for our kids' school and they turned out so well.  They are completely fun and cute books!  The drawings were done by the students and each child got to do a self portrait that is printed below their classroom photo-- so clever!  They had extras and even they sold out yesterday shortly after noon.

And this showed up, along with vinegar and soda for cleaning.  But I have no idea who?  We found it in a Target bag in our garage... and the mystery of who brought it remains.  But thank you!  I'm reading up on how to go about using them to clean.

Hello new staple in my diet.  So there is something called the Budwig diet.  Its the name of a German Scientist who discovered a process that happens when you blend flax oil with organic cottage cheese.  The oil takes away all the cheese properties, while combing with it and forming a new compound that helps a body rid itself of cancer.  But really, you just have to google it and make up your own mind.  I think its worth a shot.  It tastes good and helps me feel like I am doing something good for myself.  

Each day I make strides in learning a little more, and then trying to assimilate and blend them into every day life.  But so far, my bloodwork is showing signs of improvement.  Whether its the chemo, or diet, or both, its slowly making a difference.  But I can only understand when the values aren't what they should be...  so now I am tackling a foreign language -lab results for chemo patients- wow, fortunately when I don't get it, I can just blame it on chemo brain and people just nod in agreement.  There is always a silver lining when you look for it- even when you're in blend mode.


  1. Sometimes, 'blender' mode is the best one can do. God always gives you the things you can do that day. Tomorrow will/may be different. Keep blending, discovering. God bless.

  2. It might be an odd blessing to know that blender brain is a side effect, rather than something that just turned up.

  3. A brain as good and strong as yours can afford to be touched by blender brain, and still come out above the rest of us. Look at all the information you are having to digest - besides all those other goodies you mentionned.

    I am SO glad you are trying some of these alternative things in concert with all the traditional treatments.

    You go girl!!!

  4. There's a lot for you to assimilate ... you're doing great!

  5. I LOVE that yearbook! What a clever idea and the kids will look at their artwork years from now and see what their own rendition of themselves was. That's awesome.

    Blender brain or no, you're doing an awesome job of keeping focused on the fight and recovery. Those natural remedies can only help the process,keep at it.

  6. Keep up the good work and do what you think is best for you.

    The more you detox your system the better your body will fight. You just have to give those little soldiers the right tools to not just win a battle but the war.
    Go for it.

  7. hey, if anything good for you tastes good, well, now that's something special !

    keep fighting your war vicky...we're so proud of you !

  8. You can move mountains Vicky with that wonderfully dynamic life force within you.

    Your writing reaches our hearts and stirs our minds. What a gift you have my creative friend. Thank you for sharing it with us.

    Love you. - Kelly

  9. I think you can just yield to blender brain, embrace it!

    I love how you are caring for yourself, keep going, wonderful Vicky!

  10. i'm so proud of you for how you're fighting. and don't feel alone in the chemo brain... mine is just pain brain but i play guess that word with people all the time... describing objects until they come up with the word for me :)

  11. What else can we do but all we can do? You're reading, you're tackling, you're eating well, and you're buying flowers. To me, that's SMART when you aren't up to planting, and I'm not either. My flower bed looks like a really old person lives here. Well....wait a minute..... But I'm betting that someone will read this and, with all your loving friends, don't be surprised to walk out one morning and find someone has DONE all the flower planting! Please post pics if it happens. :)


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