I "tossed my cookies," for the first time last Friday morning. I was nauseous. Usually that means- eat something quick.
So I grabbed the zucchini bread Colton and I had prepared the night before and spread a little butter on it. I had eaten several pieces the night before and they were so tasty.
It barely got past my mouth and I knew instantly it wasn't going down.
It's taken me 2 1/2 years for chemo to make me sick, but it finally happened.
I sipped sprite and nibbled soda crackers the rest of the day.
But it signaled to me I couldn't go out of town with my friends. The "Moorhead Girls" were getting together in Sioux Falls, and I knew I was in no shape to go.
Yet, I didn't feel left out.
I was sent texts and pics all weekend long and it was clear, as Elizabeth said, "our planets came together."
How else do you explain them running across this sign?
I also had some surprise deliveries to my door and will be working on getting some thank you's out soon! Thank you to all of you who go out of your way to brighten my day- it works!
Rick left for Idaho yesterday. I will see Dr. Panwalkar tomorrow, with my weighty list of side effects, and then have my infusion.
A sweet friend sent this to me in a fb posting a couple of weeks ago. Have you seen Mandisa's Overcomer? Not only does her video feature Robin Roberts and her cancer fight, but the lyrics have such a good message.
Its never lost on me that so many of you, so many of us, are carrying some heavy burdens. Illness, caregiving for sick loved ones, end of marriage, loss of loved ones, etc.
Maybe- what it teaches all of us- is that being in this community together- sharing our stories with each other- one holding up the other- we can all be "Overcomers."
I love you! I am hugging you! sorry you missed spending time with your girlfriends!!
ReplyDeleteYes, overcome is what we must do!! I think when we really face what we are going through, and keep God at our side we are more able to tunnel through. Facing things instead of ignoring them - seeing what we learn and grow from them - I think that is how we can also overcome. Its the process of overcoming that really makes us overcomers!!
xoxoxo
Such a depth to your wisdom Tiffany and I know its because you're an overcomer as well! xxoo
DeleteAwwwww, so nice they were able to "include" you, even if you weren't able to go.
ReplyDeleteIt's bad enough to be going through what you are going through, without the nasty side effects. Rats to that! Hope you feel better soon.
Thank you- I felt so included and happy to see what a great time they had together!
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ReplyDeleteOh, Vicky. I'm so sorry you're feeling and experiencing that side effect now. And I'm really sorry you missed your girls' weekend. :( Praying for that visit with Dr. P tomorrow and for extra support while Rick is out of town. Sometimes, the strangest thing about the trials we walk through is how we still have to walk through all the regular things of life, too, like husbands having to work, kids getting sick, bills, messes, decisions, etc. Nothing stops, does it. But that does make any little special thing seem so much MORE important and carves itself indelibly on us. SO wishing I could be more effective in easing things in your life. I KNOW you were/are praying for me. Love you so much, my sweet and oh-so-kind friend.
ReplyDeleteWise words Robynn- and I hope you know you showing up here with your thoughtful and perceptive words that give me perspective and encouragement- that does ease the burden for me- more than you could know! Love you so~
DeleteWhen I saw the sign on your header, I beamed! Smiled from the tips of my tosies all the way to the top of my head. GREAT sign!!
ReplyDeleteI'm so very sorry that you are sick from chemo, sweet friend.
Extra prayers for you going up today.
You know I luvs you gurl!!
Your friend from South Jawja...
Jackie
Thankful you could join in the joy with me and I hope you know I'm feeling your love!! Love you back!
DeleteOh, I HATE that you weren't able to go on your girl's weekend. Seriously, my heart just sank when I read that. So glad they were able to make you feel included, and that sign is fantastic!
ReplyDeleteI, too, am one of those that can usually control nausea with a bite or two of something. I'm glad to know I'm not alone because my surgeon has argued with me about this multiple times - saying that it is a contradiction and impossible. Sooooo not impossible! I am also glad that you've managed to avoid succumbing to nausea up to this point, and I hope that that trend continues and that this was an isolated incident.
I know- I've been a "maybe" before and still been able to go, but this chemo has made me say no twice- ugh. Makes me truly grateful for all the times I have been able to go though! And the nausea thing- my doctor actually told me to- try a few bites and a few sips of some things. So there you go!
DeleteForgot to mention that I love Overcomer, although the video is what pushed it over the top for me. Brian, who is having a pretty horrific school year, has been listening to it every morning on his way to work and has loved it.
ReplyDeleteSp sorry to hear about Brian- yeeps- that says a lot if he is listening to that song to help him get through his day- oh boy. Will say some prayers for him for that!
Deletecan't think of a better song for these days!
ReplyDeletehugs!
So true Jenn- so grateful to have a friend send it my way :) So happy to see you here! Loved your email even though I didn't get to properly respond :)
DeleteOh Vicky,
ReplyDeletelove you so much! I am sorry that you cant be with your girls :-(.
I hope its possible to lessen your sideeffects! You know ... you are my heroine, always!
Bussals
Mimi
Thinking of you sweet one- lots and lots :) Love you- Bussals!
DeleteDear Vicky,
ReplyDeleteI´m sorry that you can´t go out with your friends.
Hope, you´ll bebetter, soon!!!
You are always on my mind!! I pray for you!!!
Hugs and 1000 kisses from germany,
Barbara
Dear Barbara- oh my- your English is getting so good!! Thank you so much for your sweet words and prayers- hugs right back to you!
DeleteYou can always find little blessings in everyday life. Having your girlfriends share the day with you with texts and pictures was indeed a blessing. And, that sign! Wow! Proves you were right there along with them. :) You are loved!
ReplyDeleteHope these side effects can be lessened for you. I know my dad had to have his chemo dose lowered so he could eat something. Praying for you and thinking of you always!
Love and hugs! Eileen
Its so true Eileen- you can find them. I was able to rest so much and know that they were all out having a ball and still feeling a part of it- was great! Love and hugs to you!
DeleteSo true vicky.
ReplyDeleteEvery one has something.
But we wake up every day and so it was meant to be.
It leaves us with hope that tomorrow will always bring something better and today we live
the best we can. Important to keep a positive mind.
Did you look into stem cell studies?
Such words of wisdom Vic- thank you for those! I spend a portion of my day looking at all kinds of studies- the latest trials, the newest drugs, the latest treatments, etc. I have to invest every day as the amount of info is staggering and changes all the time.
DeleteIf you're not an overcomer, then I don't know who is, sweet Vicky. Thanks for witnessing to all of us!
ReplyDeleteThank you for always being so encouraging and witnessing right along side me friend!
DeleteSorry you are missing time with your friends... but your friends have brought you along in their hearts til next time. Prayers and thoughts for you, sweet Vicky.
ReplyDeleteSo true Katie- they indeed brought me along :)
DeleteDearest Vicky,
ReplyDeleteOnce again I am amazed at how much I learn from reading your posts. I am grateful beyond words that you are so honest and authentic in your journey. I felt so sad you couldn't join your Morehead buddies on their trip, but I also felt amazed (again and again) at how God works. That sign, oh my goodness. Snicklefritz. Yes, you were there in spirit. And what great friends you have to include you with pictures and text messages.
I started teaching (college) yesterday and have about 120 students a day. Since I'm in the communication studies field I have the honor of really sharing in their lives. That song
"Overcomer" will get used in my classroom and may set the theme for our conference this year. While I teach at a public institution, there are always opportunities to share my faith. I have shared your story with some of my favorite students and asked them to keep you in their prayers. With your permission, I hope to tell your story in a bigger venue to help raise funds for fighting Breast Cancer.
Many of my students fight HUGE battles in their lives. You inspire me every day and I know you will inspire them too.
I am so grateful for you, Vicky. God is using you and your story to bring others to Him.
I am proud to call you my friend. My prayer is that you feel better soon, regain energy and
find a way to mitigate these side effects. I won't stop praying.
Prayers and love from Spokane Washington!!
Linda
LInda- thank you for your ever gracious words! So excited to hear you are teaching college and in the field of communications field to boot! I always think even sharing a tiny part of my story helps the larger story of so many of us- go out to the masses. I'm truly honored friend, that you would do that. And please let me know if you need anything from me, ever. I thank you so much. Hugs and love to you!
DeleteJust a big hug <3
ReplyDeleteBig hug right back :)
DeleteYou are always, always looking for blessings. And it touches everyone who knows you!
ReplyDeleteOvercomer. Is there a more wonderful word?!
Love you. Praying for you and yours.
Julie- I am- they so give me perspective and focus when my very human heart and mind otherwise would get stuck on more negative thoughts and emotions- it truly grounds me to do so. I know- overcomer- its definitely a keeper! Love you honey- thankful for you!
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