Friday, January 24, 2014

gratitude amidst the mess… and the gift from our hockey family...


For some reason the day treatment unit seemed quiet yesterday.  There were very few people in the rooms surrounding mom, few sitting in the waiting rooms, and a very calm environment throughout the day.  

Mom seemed eager to get on with the procedure and let them try not once, not twice, but three times to hit a vein for her iv.  It was shortly before 9 when she was all ready to go back to the OR.  I sat in the MRI waiting room, chatting with a friend waiting for her doctor's appointment.  It was a lovely distraction.

Merely 45 minutes later, I was paged to the back room to wait for Dr. Teigen.  All the consult rooms were full so I ended up in the MRI sedation bay again, giggling at the thought of all the time I've spent there.  What better place to hear how mom's procedure went?

Dr. Teigen strode into the room and got right down to it.  "The procedure went well, your mom is doing fine.  She will be in recovery the next hour or so, upstairs.  It was a bad fracture, but I got it all.  I would bet, based on her history now, with her bones as soft as they are, she has at least a 50 percent chance of the next vertebrae down, breaking as well.  But then we'll just fix that one too.  

He is confident, without sounding arrogant, and I appreciate his insight and experience.  
The tech's tell me now would be a good time to get something to eat.  So I go off to the cafeteria and grab a big salad.  

I finish early and wander over to the main entrance.  As I pass by the long hallway joining the clinic with the hospital, I see a man gazing out the window at the flame I had taken a picture of just last week.  His whole body is turned away from the hall, and as I approach, I notice its shaking.  I can see from a sideways view, the man is quietly crying, his body racked with sobs attacking in waves.  He is curled in a ball, his feet tucked up underneath him.  

I'm choked with my own tears, and yet it doesn't seem right to intrude on his moment.  I simply walk on, uttering a quick prayer, for his sorrow, and the idea that my own loved one is fine today.  I feel God's presence and my fragile heart takes strength from the surge of gratitude I feel.

Moments later I am back in my mom's room and she is snoring away, loudly.  I have to laugh as I realize, clearly she is comfortable when she can sleep so deeply, oblivious to all going on around her.

I sit silently, waiting for her to rouse herself.  Its so quiet, very few patients near her again.  So its no surprise when a gentleman approaches our nurse, Vickie, with a question.  

He is mild mannered.  Soft spoken.  Something about his delivery has me wondering.  He explains that his wife had been in a room down the hall earlier in the day.  The doctor had brought them a picture, and they had forgotten it.  His wife desperately wanted to see it now.  Could they look in the room or would it have been placed somewhere?  Our nurse offers to help, but explains the room has been cleaned and nothing is left in there.  And where is his wife?

And then he says the words that brings the whole experience to new life.  She was admitted after the D&C and the picture of the inside of her belly before the procedure would bring such comfort.

Sweet Jesus.  As my mother lays snoring, I am reminded again, that others have had life-changing days today.  And while I've been through hard, and exhausting and challenging, my mother is doing fine today.  I'm overflowing with gratitude.  This was the perspective I needed, and it seems I got the message loud and clear.

Mom wakes eventually, sits up, walks with help to the bathroom, eats a late lunch, and gets dressed.  Just like that, she is ready to go, late in the afternoon.  I get her out to her ride back to Bethany, hug her and know she is in good hands.  


I come home for the night.  Feeling more convinced I would be able to go to Roseau with Colton.  I curl up in bed, exhausted and much like mom, I manage to sleep soundly while the phone rings, and visitors come and the doorbell rings and the dog barks.  

I awaken as Colton tosses me an envelope.  I groggily open it and find this beautifully handwritten note inside:



Tears stream.  All the tension, all the worry, everything, melts away.  Our hockey family has rescued us yet again.  We feel so fortunate to be surrounded by so many who care about us.

THANK YOU to our PEEWEE B FAMILY!  Words can barely express the gratitude we feel for such a generous and extremely thoughtful gesture.  You've touched us immensely and we couldn't be more proud to part of such a great group of people! 


I've just talked to mom.  She is groggy, but feeling okay.  She plans on hanging out in her chair, resting.  Colton and I are packing and Grandpa Jim just brought us snacks, and will stay with the dog.  

Thank you all for your prayers that continue to nourish and lift us so.  


















30 comments:

  1. Praise God! I am so glad that your Mom is doing better. You are so blessed to be surrounded by so much love. Enjoy your weekend with Colton!

    Gratitude is an art of painting an adversity into a lovely picture. ~Kak Sri

    Love and prayers.

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    1. I am Eileen- I truly feel blessed in so many ways. And having you here, faithfully, supporting us and offering encouragement is one of those huge blessings I have benefited from- so thank you friend! Such a great quote- not one I've heard- so perfectly fitting right now- thank you.

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  2. Priceless. Enjoy your weekend.

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    1. Thanks Cheri! We had a great weekend :) So thankful!

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  3. I am so blessed that you have been blessed with this gift from your hockey family. God is so good, and he uses people to bless us. YAY!

    And your experience from the hospital - it's a reminder that it's so important to have the right perspective. I'm glad your Mom is doing well, and came through the recent procedure just fine. Thanks be to God. :-)

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    1. Yes- Thanks be to God- Amen. So thankful for his provision through so many angels all working on our behalf so it seems. Thankful for your perspective and words of support and encouragement always Susan!

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  4. How do you do it Vicky...find so much joy and appreciation in life, when your days are filled with so many trails? I feel ashamed that I inwardly moan and groan over that, which compared to yours, seems so trivial. I pray that you will continue to find strength, choose joy and uplift those around you. ~~~ Libby

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    1. So sweet of you Libby to say that. Two things I think- help shape my thinking. First is the numbering of my days… it truly reshapes how you think about everything. Secone, I think Gitz really mentored me in that way. I felt my own trials to be so small when I thought of hers, and realized she was clearly onto a better way of "living" despite everything she had going against her. It motivated me to want to try at least. Clearly- she was on to something and I can vouch for her "ways." Hugs to you- so great to see you show up here and I pray you are well!

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  5. Oh...utter Joy I feel as I read this.
    For so many reasons.
    Love you, my friend!

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    1. So glad the joy came through- I was feeling it too! Love you right back friend!

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  6. Enjoy the weekend! Glad to hear your mom is a trooper and doing okay!

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    1. She is indeed a trooper and it helps me to fully embrace being able to go- so thankful for that!

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  7. all I could do was smile at this post!...Vicky dear..you found the gifts all around you...and embraced and sometimes in the midst of so much..we reach for it..knowing its there..but struggle..and then all of a sudden when we least exspect it...there it is again..the light, the sunshine thru the clouds...and we Become again.... much love!

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    1. Hi Peggy Sue!
      You have been on my mind, in my heart and in my prayers. How are you doing?
      I always love your comments to Vicky. So full of insight and love.
      Sending you hugs and loves,
      Your friend, Linda

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    2. Peggy Sue- So true what you say- we reach and reach for it- knowing its there- but not able to fully grasp it for whatever the reason. Then, suddenly, its there and crashing down over us and yes- I love what you said - we "become," again. Exactly right- spoken like one who has been there and knows :) Love to you!

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  8. Such beautiful people, all of you. Have a wonderful weekend !

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    1. Thanks Karen- they are- and we truly did :)

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  9. I felt this post all the way to my throat. Such sweet words and dear, dear friends. Isn't that what His Love is like? xoxoxxo

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    1. So true Julie- so true. Love how you put it into words and your unique perspective always. Love to you!

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  10. Dear, dear Vicky,
    I am glowing as I read this post. What an answer to prayer, on every front. Your Mom, your trip, answered prayers. And above all, I am AMAZED at how God works.

    You, my dear friend, are showered with love. Everywhere. Love and prayers, and hopes and dreams and more prayers, and gifts and caring and support, from near and far. Everywhere...love for you and your sweet family. If we could all reach in and take out that cancer ourselves, we would do it for you.

    You, a shining light, showering grace and gratitude and love and prayers, right back to us. I have prayed again and again and again that you would get to make that trip with your sweet boy who so loves his Momma. And now you are!!!

    God must be smiling.

    And from Spokane, a huge HURRAH!! for the PEEWEE B Family
    for stepping in to help you and Colton have a great weekend together.

    Sending you huge loves and support from Spokane!
    Your friend, Linda

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    1. The abundance I feel, is overwhelming at times, Linda- truly- such a blessing- and coming in ways I could never conceive. It truly opens my eyes to how I can do the same for others :) Your insight and way with words is truly a gift to me- not to mention your love and steadfastness! Love you friend~to the moon- and all the way back~

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  11. Hurray!! I hope you're having a fantastic weekend with your boys and hockey family!

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    1. Thanks Melissa- we did :) In more ways than I can say...

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  12. Vicky - and we do - so many do - continue to pray. I continue to pray for you in the quiet moments in our dark room rocking the baby and when I peek out the window and see the big moon, I pray for you to be in the shelter of His wings.

    You are a gifted writer, friend. You are constantly giving to us through your words.

    As always ---- praying quietness & trust will be your strength.

    Enjoy your family this weekend - your extra large family full of sweaty boys and proud parents. I am rooting to - for them and for you.

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    1. So sweet to read your words Cheyenne- I feel your words so. Thank you for writing, and reading, and praying- it all adds up into heartfelt gifts to me and makes me feel so blessed. Love to you and the babe and the whole precious fam of yours.

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  13. Aww so nice! I am so happy your Mom is going to be ok now.
    Yes hospitals are heart breaking. You have to have a strong character and yet be sensitive to peoples emotional needs. I think I'd be crying all day unless they kept me in a place when I had to be very busy not to have time to think or look into peoples eyes.
    xoxoxoxo

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    1. It takes a special person to work in a hospital setting for sure. I admire all who do!

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    1. I am glad to hear your mom is recovering. It must be such a relief to know she is being cared for and is in good hands!
      I hope you were able to relax a little with your PeeWee B hockey family. The note and gift to you was very touching!
      Hugs and prayers to you, always!!!

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    2. Thanks Steph- I had a great time this weekend and long to do the same with Nolan one time this year too- I heard they had a good weekend! Thanks for your faithful support always!

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