I should have known...
As I have prepared for our family photoshoot with Ria, I had so many concerns flooding my head. How will I "tame" my wild hair? Its become curly with cowlicks popping up, and can I somehow manage to make it look, "photo worthy?" Can I find a shirt that fits my swollen arm, while covering my port? But please let it look cute! Can I draw in those eyebrows that are just making a reappearance? The eyelashes... or where for art thou eyelashes? Can I? A million times over, can I?
Even the day of the shoot I wonder...
Will the boys cooperate? They don't like wearing jeans... and did I match their clothes ok? Will Rick be able to carve out some time from his deadline? Will we make it in one piece?
Suddenly, it's photo day. I peek under the shade early Monday morning and the sun glints through the blue sky... and we're off. Its a day chock full of preparing for all kinds of things. But underneath, I still wonder, can I?
The time draws near for us to leave... but Rick's shirt has creases and he needs to iron. And Colton's jeans are too loose, and where is that belt? And my hair? Oh goodness, it has a mind of its own!
But suddenly we're pulling up... and it's time! And as I step out into the golden sunshine highlighting the lush green, the red hues of the rustic barn, the bursts of color from all the wild flowers... I remember...
"It's not about me..."
This life I live? Really, God's glory shone so brightly all around me I knew that even if I can't... HE can. His way, not mine. His will, not mine. And when I let go?
Look how HE shows up!
He puts my little family, in the uber talented hands of Miss Ria, and then shines a light down across all of his creation and we get to humbly stand in the midst of it. Really? The abundance overwhelms and my gratitude explodes.
And then YOU, all show up when Ria posts the photo from above on my Facebook page and says this:
"As soon as I clicked the shutter I knew this would be my favorite shot of the night. One of the things I love most about the gift of photography is the ability to see a "feeling", and I hope you can both see and FEEL love when you look at this."
And that photo gets liked, and loved over 200 times, and I'm deeply humbled by the sweetest of words and encouragement left for me. It's 200 times 200 times 200... multiplying love to infinity.
I take a few quick photos before we leave- the sun set is spectacular, just like the last time we were so blessed to shoot pictures with Ria. God's hand is clearly showing through all of this.
So this is what I'll take with me tomorrow at 1pm, to the MRI tube, and the sedation nurse. This little piece of "heaven," and my prayer list.
Can I add you to my list? How can I pray for you? Please leave a note in the comments below and as I prepare both tomorrow for the brain MRI and Friday for a PET scan, I'll pray.
I'll see Dr. Panwalkar next week and come back to share scan results soon.
And more photos to come...
The photo is so filled with meaning and captures so much. And I love that you are doing this again and I am reminded that we should, sometime, do a family photo. We never have and I think I'm going to regret that. Thank you for inspiration and courage that even though not everything is perfect, and even if perfect is nowhere near attainable, this IS life and it has to be celebrated just as it is.
ReplyDeletePrayers for your day tomorrow and for your results, dear Vicky. You continue to amaze and inspire. Prayer request would be for a beat and lifelong friend who had her double mastectomy last year. She has lymph edema and just found out that she must wear her pressure sleeve always and every day. And insurance doesn't recognize or pay for lymph edema treatments. How is that even POSSIBLE? Yes, prayers for her would be greatly appreciated. I know you know. Love to you.
I have had a long history with lymphedema and yes- its such a nuisance to deal with and yes, often not covered by insurance. Or- you get lucky and mine is completely covered, but the company will no longer carry that type of policy because the expense of it all is too much for them to cover! I will pray for your dear friend!
DeleteI'd deeply appreciate prayer for my adjustment to being the mom of a married son. He has asked me to give them space and I'm trying to honor that, all the while missing them and wanting to know all the little details about their new life.
ReplyDeleteOh my heart, Jenn, I can only imagine. Am hoping I see your blog pop to the top of my list soon-ish? Maybe you have some words to share? Blessings and love to you!
DeleteOh my dear sweet, wonderful friend,
ReplyDeleteYour words at once make my heart sing and then rejoice in God's love! I can almost FEEL the gratitude and blessing of you being out there and feeling God's presence. And that picture, oh that picture! I just can't seem to stop crying as I soak in all that is going on between you and Rick.. Isn't that what REAL love is? Wrapping each other up, like in a quilt, to celebrate all that is good and withstand all that is hard!
There just aren't words adequate enough to express the place you hold in my heart, my dear soul sis! Praying and praying for great results from all of your tests and scans. Thanks for keeping Joe in your prayers as he battles leukemia.!
Love you to the moon and back...always!!
Linda
PS Your hair and outfit look absolutely darling!!!! "Cute as a bug," as my grandma used to say! How could they not...because you radiate love inside and out!!
DeleteDear friend- so glad you could feel it too. And did you know? You were there! That is the beautifully hand made quilt by our sweet Peggy! With you, and her, and the auction you did for us- and then the gift of the quilt- how can I not feel surrounded by love? And I"m so grateful to even have my hair back, truly happy with every chemo curl that grows!
DeleteOh my!!! It's the quilt that Peggy made. I saw photos of it flat out when we did the auction for you, but it is even more gorgeous when wrapped around you!!! Peggy's
Deleteart of love. That makes the photo even more perfect!
Love you, Vicky!
Oh My...now I am in tears. yesterday I saw your post...I was not able to respond due to lack of internet connection. I was going to tex you Vicky and tell you... this picture is truly beautiful in the coloring, the light but more so what stands out "The Bond of love! The trust of Love, The place to lean of love! The incredible journey that this love has had to endure and fight for.... The gift of the kind of love were your soul is seen above all else...were love truly thrives in the heart and soul..not in the superficial but in all the BEAUTY..because this picture shares all that and then some...and i longed longed to someday have a picture like this myself. I cant imagine a more perfect pic!!! and then I choose to try to see if I could get back on..so I am sitting on my daughters porch and I see what Linda wrote...and the quilt!!! Oh my..I so loved the quilt wrapped around you both...and yet...the picture is thus that all ones see's is what love truly is...and I did not even clue into the quilt. So as I read these words...and the fact it was 'The quilt' tears just came...To just be a wee part of that picture...but Vicky and Linda... all of a sudden it was like a gift of hope for me...someday..maybe someday...I can know what it is like to be wrapped up in that kind of love! Vicky your example and Linda's truly touched my world...I cant wait to see the other family pic's...this however needs to be hung above your fireplace...lol it is a beauty only due to the love you two share! what a gift to know it exsist's out there! love you Vicky...you to Linda
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DeleteYour beautiful hearts shine through in that photo.
ReplyDeleteBoth of yours.
You and your Superman are wonderful examples of love.
Thank you for your prayers for others.
What a loving heart you have.
May God's blessings continue to surround, hug, and hold you....
Always.
Love,
Jackie
Jackie, the love that always flows through your grace-filled words fills my heart so! Our Gitz used to pray when she perhaps needed prayers the most- she taught me well. Much love and blessings to you~
DeleteLove you right back....
DeleteYou are a wonderful soul, Vicky. Love the photo ♥
ReplyDeletesummerdaisycottage.blogspot.com
Loved visiting your blog, Summer. Thanks for your lovely comment on mine!
DeleteGorgeous photo!! When I first saw it on FB, I wanted to LOVE it but felt self conscious because I don't know the photographer. Aftee reading this beautifully written post I realized that was silly and promptly took care of that. Love is the best lighting that there is, in my humble opinion! Peace to you, tomorrow xxx
ReplyDeleteSusan, Oh how I love what you said "love is the best lighting there is." Amen! Thank you for both "liking" and "loving" Ria's photo of us! Blessings to you!
DeleteThinking of you as I so often do and letting you, as always, remind what's important!!!!
ReplyDeleteAhh- I'm reminding myself when I sit down and take the time to pour out those words and thoughts! Love that it has that effect on others too.
DeleteSuch beautiful people. Such a beautiful photo. Huge prayers surround you always!
ReplyDeleteSo grateful for those prayers, always, Kass. Always.
DeleteThank you so much for bringing to my life the story of your journey, your family, your health issues and your strong faith. All of this keeps me focusing on the hope that every rough spot will be smoothed when I stay faithfully focused on living a thankful, appreciative and loving life. The photos are wonderful. I am not sure where to find you on Facebook to see more of the photos.
ReplyDeleteKristin
Kristin, in my side bar is a Facebook link to my profile- or you can find me at Vicky Held Westra. But I don't have any more photos yet- that was a sneak peek! Ria is super booked with shoots right now and it'll be awhile to see the rest- but its always worth the wait!! Thank you for your grace filled words- they truly touch me!
DeleteOhhhhh, so much love in this picture. Makes me tear up. Thank you for sharing your heart and soul with us.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful picture. I continue to keep you in my prayers, dear Vicky.
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